and everyone in this city is mating like bunnies.
(I just hope for their sake they are all infertile)
I found a bunch of orange pills in a film canister while looking for tylenol in my purse.
I don’t know where I got them or what they are for
but I’m taking two.
- Me: I have the worst headache Mama.
- Bexx: It think it's the weird weather. I had a headache all day. I took so many drugs and I still have a slight one. Excedrin is the only thing that works and they took it off the shelves for some recall. And I can't find it anywhere. Take some meds.
- Bexx: You are going to be in your cousin Jackie's school project. She wanted to know which relative graduated from a 4 year college and what their major was.
- Me: I haven't graduated yet.
- Bexx: I know I told her you were graduating in June. So don't make me a liar.
- Me: Before, I was like (insert random noises/spastic hand gestures here)
- Mallory: You were smitten.
- Me: Is that what that translates to?
You know when you get invited to some event you could care less about, but you go anyway because there is free food and booze (and you get kinda excited because of all the free food and booze).
Then you get there…
You’re assigned to the one seat right across from the one person you keep hoping you don’t see around, but for some reason that hope only makes them appear everywhere you go.
So, you forget all about the free food
and all you start thinking about is the free booze.
Soon enough the girl working the bar eventually stops carding you
because you are now that-girl-who-is-here-for-the-free-booze.
(Does this still happen to you? This still happens to me.)
- Me: What has surprised you about media over the years?
- (I can hear Bexx yelling at him in the background for leaving his bowl on the ground.)
- Dad: Well, there is no device to turn off your wife yet.